Hair shirt

Once upon a time I really wanted to wear a hair shirt, a'la Thomas More. I googled some nunnery that promoted the wearing of hair undershirts and asked them where I could buy one. They emailed back asking me my religion (I was/am an atheist), did I know hair shirts were scratchy (yes, that was the point), and had I really thought this through (no). It just seemed an easy way to be a better person.

They wouldn't tell me where I could buy one, and eventually I threw my giant hair ball away. Now I'm not sure why I thought it a good idea -- I mean, whenever I feel the least bit sick, I turn bitchy. How would a hair shirt make me feel?

What's more, Thomas More hid his hair shirt underneath mounds of red brocade. I would've had to hide it under a sequined tank top. Gads, I can't imagine the comments I'd get in the bars here if I went out in one.

P.S. I'm feeling sick and bitchy right now, in case you're interested.

I have a travel story, too

I was in Berlin walking through the Tiergarten park, when I saw what I thought was a fat, nude sun-bather. I had a new camera attachment for my Palm Pilot and wanted to try it out, so I surreptiously snapped a photo (I wasn't yet used to how people in Berlin love to be nude in public). I downloaded the grainy photo onto my computer and sent it to a coworker as a joke...like, look at the photo of the big fat nude guy in the park! Then I happened to look at it more carefully -- it was of two nude men having sex. It was awful...especially as I had a crush on this coworker. Thankfully, he deleted it without looking at it (upon my urgent request). I'm sure he would have wondered why I was sending him a photo of a gay couple going at it.