My first letter to the FT

I apologize for being so excited, as one should never display excitement about one's own achievements (pretending not to be excited only increases the admiration of others, I know), but, well, I'm just too excited. I got a letter published in the Financial Times. Of course, I realize that this will make it clear my achievements have not been great. The last time I was this proud was when I was in 10th grade and won the 'Letter of Peace' contest. But nobody even knew I won that, because my humanities teacher, after promoting the contest for months, tried to squish the news -- he wanted someone who didn't skip class to win. But, I still got to give an emotional reading about my vision for world peace to the DeKalb Elks Club, who promptly implemented it. (And you have all seen the results.)

Ah, Mr. LoCascio, if only you could see me now!

Actually, maybe not. At least not until I wash off my face mask and vacuum up the spider I just killed in my kitchen with "Outdoor RAID".

Because the FT is a pay-site, here is my letter:

"Sir,

I presume that those politicians who see a threat in Asia's growing scientific capabilities ("Do not fear the rise of world-class science in Asia") likewise would feel more secure living next door to an unemployed drop-out, as opposed to a wealthy scientist. I myself would choose the scientist (especially if he were single, but that's beside the point of this email)."

Excuse me. I am now going to press the newsprint to my forehead and find a tattoo parlour.